Welcome Aboard the Hot Mess Express!

I want to tell you about one of the most toxic relationships I was ever in. I will refer to it as “C”.

For 16 years, from the time I was 18 until I was 34, C controlled my life. C did not care if it was freezing outside. C did not care if it was raining. C did not care if I was tired, sick, or exhausted.

Every 15 to 20 minutes, C demanded my attention. Forcing me to go outside when i didn’t want to. In the freezing cold, in the pouring rain. And I listened. Like a faithful dog, i would go and cater to C. I left warm rooms. Family dinners. Safe spaces. I stood outside in the cold and rain just to satisfy C.

C stole my breath. C drained my money. C controlled my mood and my schedule. And somehow, I still defended C. Even after numerous attempts in the past to leave, I always found my way back. I kept giving until I had nothing left.

But one day, 12 years ago today, on January 29, 2014, I finally chose myself. I finally made the decision to quit cigarettes for good! I walked away. I broke free.

That was 12 years ago. I have been free from the chains of cigarettes for 12 beautiful years! Twelve years of freedom. Twelve years of deeper breaths. Twelve years of choosing life.

If you are stuck in a toxic relationship with a habit, an addiction, or something that is hurting you, hear this.

You do not have to stay.
I left. And I have never looked back. 🤍